Issues to Ponder

As of late, there have been two things that I just can't stop thinking about:

1. Thanks to Iceland, Russia is coming.
2. The colonization and terraformation of Mars.

Since Iceland's financial fuck up, and the inevitable Russian loan, it appears that the geothermal resort-turned-nation is about to play host to the increasingly aggressive Russians, right here in the West. I never expected Iceland to turn on us for their 'new friend,' Russia. I thought, how are we going to be able to stand up to Russia if it has an outpost so deep in the West? Then, I remembered how at their nearest point, just 4km separate Alaska from Russia, closer than Florida is to Cuba which, clearly, is also closer than Iceland is to the States. As we all know now, Sarah Palin has been fighting the Russians since before she became governor, so we might want to reconsider who we vote for, so that the whole country can combat the Russians just as well. We need her expertise in order to make certain that we can resist Russian aggression on the Eastern frontier of the country. So, here is the deal: If you don't want Iceland to team up with Russia in a fight against all that is good in the world, vote for McCain and Palin. Iceland has always been a threat -- Bjork is evidence enough. I guess we can wear those Russian ushankas, though. I do like them. Anyhow, don't let the Icelandic dream come to fruition. We can't afford to. But, if we do, at least we have an escape route, which is where my second issue comes into play.

Let me just throw this out there: I cannot wait to live on Mars. The photo in this post is what Mars could look like if we go through with the terraforming process. This would be like a whole new opportunity to be an explorer, which is actually my dream career. Too bad there is no exploring left to be done here on Earth. It doesn't sound that hard, and at this point, the journey there is nine months. Everyone loves road trips, so who wouldn't love a nine-month one? We all know that those on Mars would be the best and the brightest. They have already sent some thing called Phoenix up there, so we all know we made the cut. Congratulations, everyone - we're going to take over the universe. 3-2-1 chicken blastoff to Mars.

See you there, and you can thank Iceland for expediting this process.